THE OTHER SIDE OF SHAME

Many a times, people are put off by the mere mention of the word “shame.” No sensible human being would enjoy going through a shameful situation. However, over a year ago, it suddenly dawned on me that they are two sides to shame. I thought on this fact extensively leading to the build up of this article. The more I thought about this, it made me arrive at the conclusion that shame might not be a bad thing altogether to experience. I can imagine the surprise on the faces of people as they read this. Perhaps, you are thinking that only an insane person would ever associate “shame” with anything good.

More often than not, we hear the statement “you have no shame” being directed towards someone. This statement is often made when someone who has done something wrong or inappropriate is unrepentant or too proud to make amends. Every day, we come across people who repeatedly behave in wrong and inappropriate ways regarded as shameful. For example, if a 40-year-old man who is expected to be married with children feels comfortable to live under the providence and shelter of his parents, society says, “He has no shame”. The case is different if this 40 year old man has done all he knows to be successful in life to no avail. It is a shameful thing for a 10-year-old not to be able to read, not less a university graduate.  In addition, an adult who rapes a child is said to have no shame.

As much as the mere mention of the word “shame” spells negativity, we can learn how to live positives lives from it. Below are some of the reasons to justify that shame has two sides:

1.      The fear of shame puts us on our toes and empowers us to strive towards right and successful living. It helps us move past a life of mediocrity, excuses, and laziness.

2.      The fear of shame empowers us to build and develop unquestionable character.

3.      The fear of shame will prevent someone in a place of authority to ask for bribe in order to grant someone’s request.

4.      The fear of shame prevents us from being lazy, irresponsible, and over reliant on other people-it saves us from living a parasitic life style.

5.      The fear of shame motivates us to strive to be the best in whatever we commit ourselves to accomplish.

6.      The fear of shame motivates us to live a life of responsibility, discipline, and maturity towards those who directly or indirectly depend on us for sustainability.

7.      The fear of shame, leading from a fear of being caught sometimes has the power to stop a man or woman from cheating on their spouse.

8.      It is the fear of shame, which could result from failure that motivates a student to make attending lectures and reading their book a priority.

9.      The fear of shame will prevent a man from defrauding his friend or brother and the citizenry.

10.  The fear of shame will prevent men and women from acting in inappropriate ways or from doing the wrong things.

11. The fear of shame will prevent political leaders from looting the state treasury. Likewise, it is lack of shame that makes these same people tour the world and build mansions with stolen funds.

The only reason why leaders in this nation and in all Africa countries would continue to steal from the people is because they have lost all sense of shame-they have lost all sense of responsibility, discipline, and maturity. The other side of shame is a positive one. The fear of shame is the beginning of wisdom for a bright future. Selah